break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
