what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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