Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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