I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
