that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
