this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
