I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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