I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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