I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize