Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize