my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
