Whoa Z and x make the same sound
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Another day, another engagement, another cat
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
