Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I would ride that face into the sunset
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize