piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
