if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
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