my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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