I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
oh god the rape fog is back!
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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