You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
