anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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