His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
