What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Is her dick bigger than yours?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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