your room smells of hookers.
And success
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
