My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize