A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
