We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
