kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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