i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
