Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize
