Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
