Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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