i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Randomize