Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
