Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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