how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
