the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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