and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
