Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
