Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
