Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize