HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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