Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize