Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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