i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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