tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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