Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
someone owes me an orgasm
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
