My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
