So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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