There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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