U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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