Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize